Happy 21 weeks too Me!!!!!!

If I was carrying a single baby I would be at the half way point but since I am carrying two, I am 2/3rds done Yayyyy!!!!! Well I have finally started getting things together. I am having a baby shower but those who know me knows that Shirnell doesnt bank on anything, I still do what I have to do. Well me and babe went to Sams club and brought a case of 200+ diapers and a case of 600+ wipes. That was about $60. One of Sams Club cases are equal to about 2 cases in a regular store. And if one baby goes thru a case per month, the girls will be using about 2. I must admit Im beginning to get a little bit overwhelmed here. Everytime we buy something its so expensive because we have to get 2. From now until D day we are going to get all of the big purchases everytime he gets paid...there goes eating out for awhile. Im complaining but i'm not complaining because Babe will always make sure our family is okay. I wanted to go back to work after I have the girls but I dont see how that is possible. Not paying daycare for 2 infants. Its like now that my due date is getting closer Im getting a little SCARED....DAMN HORMONES!!!....Babe says not to worry. I put my trust in him, he has never let me down but I wish he didnt have to work so hard. Im sure things will work out, its just my anxiety acting up. My biggest fear is that I will be inadequate, I take good care of my 3 boys but can I take care of 5? And 2 babies at one time AHHHH!!! I dont have a choice. Well I could pack a bag and buy a one way ticket to california...hahaha...but thats not an option...I think I'll just stick round for awhile and roll with the punches.
Now as far as body changes I feel like a pig, I stop sleeping in the bed because the couch offered me more support. I am officially too big for the couch and plus Babe was sleeping on the floor next to me, he really should be in the bed. So Im back in the bed now and I cant sleep. I have 2 of the supposed best pregnancy pillows on the market and I cant lie I also use Babe as a prop. At first the pillows were great because it was something new now not so much. I suffer from chronic insomnia anyway, but its not much I can do about it during pregnancy or after because of breastfeeding. So I just do what I do best...be a nerd...google all night, anything I dont know I research, I was intellectual beyond my years before but now, Im a freaking genius. Im not feeling any big kicks yet, just a few rolls and bumps, nothing spectacular but my Dr. reassured me that the girls are very active. I have an appointment Tuesday 3/23/10. I read on google (told ya) that something called anterior placenta can block me from feeling their kicks until later on in the pregnancy. Im still very fatigued and its getting worse but I manage to get alot of things done or boss everyone else around to get things done. I have been getting alot of round ligament pain(uterine stretching) lately as if I can get any bigger. I am amazed by my pregnancy, sometimes I just look at my belly and say hey girls....I feel better about my situation for now. Next week I go back to the specialist, then I'll be a nervous wreck because he is the one that is tracking every little thing and does those long ultrasounds looking for every little thing that could be wrong. Excuse my expression but he scares the shit out of me. But he is the best that Mercy Medical Center has. I googled him. :-)