Monday, March 8, 2010

The Rundown from conception to 19 weeks.


Im going to give you all a run down of my pregnancy to this point lets start at the beginning:

November 2009
I was on birth control at the time, Nuva Ring to be exact. How it works was simple, insert it for three weeks, take it out the fourth week and during the fourth week my menstrual cycle would come. Oh yeah it was like clock work, for a year.

December 2009
Well around December 1st I take the Nuva Ring out and low and behold NO MENSTRUAL CYCLE...I wasn't worried because that can happen with birth control so I went ahead and re-inserted my ring and kept it moving no worries. I didnt even bother to tell Babe because I figured it was nothing.
Christmas was coming and I was feeling crappy so I started to worry a little but not much. I went out one day with a very close friend of mines and confided in her my fears, she suggested I get an at home pregnancy test but I laughed...Nuva Ring is 99.9% effective and it was working out fine. I hadn't been on any medications, I was never late removing it or re-inserting it. After much thought I said ''F@#k'' it and bought the damn test. It sat in my purse for awhile...awhile being I waited to see if I would get a period in January.

January 2010
So I finally decide to take the freaking test since my menstrual cycle did another ''No Show" in January. Not to mention Im feeling deathly ill. Still didnt tell Babe. I guess he didnt notice, he works all day. I go in the bathroom and locked the door. Babe comes knocking at the door and wants to have a whole conversation about his day...totally not the time. I told him I had diarrhea, that got him away. I take the test and i'm sitting there waiting the three minutes. At that point I really felt like I had diarrhea. I see two lines. I wanted to fall off the toilet, the only words I could manage to get out was ''BABE!!!!"
My husband has an old soul...he's happy..he embraces me...he's cool with it. His only concern was picking up some overtime to support our growing family. I know he will take care of his family no matter what but Im scared. We have 3 sons 9, 5 and 2. We had just made a decision to downsize from a 3br 2 bath house to an apartment so we could get our savings higher. And most of all I did not want to get fat or sick. I had just lost weight. I needed to know if everything was where it was suppose to be so we took a trip to the ER just to check. They told us everything was where it was suppose to be and the baby had a heartbeat.
A week later I was sitting in my ob/gyn's office looking at the wall. The nurse tells me i'm already at the end of my 1st trimester, 3mths, I told her not to judge me. They draw some blood and give me a referral for an ultra sound, this is where the story starts to get interesting.

February 2010
I started to accept that it was a miniature person growing inside of me. It has to grow up to be special if it got through birth control...I mean really it was only a 1% chance. I am totally sick and worried. I was so worried about the baby because of a previous miscarriage. I started praying for a girl. Everytime I had a free moment I was praying for a healthy baby girl. Feb 9, 2010, we go in for our routine ultrasound just to check the fetal age. According to my mnstrual cycle thats 15 weeks. I ask the ultrasound tech if she could possibly determine the sex of the baby she said she would try. I was still praying GIRL GIRL GIRL. She squirts the jelly on my belly and gets rolling.She yells Oh My God!!!! im like what is it something wrong.. she says look there's 2 of them. I wanted to get up off of that table and run out the door. 2 what the hell did she mean 2, 2 what, babies. . Oh my God was correct. I look over at Babe and he turned another color said something about needing a cigarette and walked out the door. Then she says they are identical and they are girls....mustve prayed a little bit too hard. She tells us they have no separating membrane and that she had to make sure they werent conjoined...they werent...but not having a separating membrane and 2 babies sharing the same placenta did not sound good. I was still so excited when I broke the news to everyone. No one knew I was pregnant but my sister and mother.
I am such a nerd so when I got home I hopped straight on google to get information about twins. My twins are what medical professionals call Monoamniotic Monochorionic or MoMo twins.
Basically they only have a 50% survival rate because their cords can strangle each other or they can cut off blood flow and oxygen from each other also referred to as cord compression. I immediatly start crying Im so scared... I couldnt even bring myself to name them....I could go to the Dr one day and they could be fine and the next time they could be dead. I start gathering all the information I can. I wanted to call my dr but it was friday night and he was closed.
Monday morning 8 am my phone is ringing, its Dr Julian he wants to see me immediately, there are somethings we need to discuss. I get there around 11 am. He gives me the run down 50% chance of survival, the girls could die in utero blah blah blah. The only thing he could do was refer me to an Perinatolist and together they would try to get my girls to the point that they would be able to survive which is 24 weeks or 6months and he said that they would take them then if they had to. He put me on bedrest as a precaution until then. Told me to stay off of google, not to worry myself and sent me out the door. How can he expect me not to worry when my children might not make it here? I did more research and joined a website for families in my same situation and alot of their babies survived. I met alot of interesting people, and found hope in light of my situation. I feel detached from my babies because I could lose them. I cant plan for them. I am playing the waiting game thats how it feels. Everyone is excited about them, they dont understand. I know let go and let God but how, I have not one but two little darlings to be worried about. Now we are up to date....to be continued.....






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